What Not To Do...With Blueberry Jam

There are so many things you shouldn't do with blueberry jam, so here's five:

1) Don't put it on your hand before shaking someone else's hand. They won't be happy about it.

2) Don't put any your eyes. Period.

3) Don't put it on your neck to make it look like your throat's been sliced. No one will fall for it and if they do, then you hang out with some pretty blind friends.

4) Don't throw your shoe into it. You'll have to put it through the washer and dryer, and shoes never get fully dry.

5) If you run out of mayo while making a turkey (or ham) sandwich, don't replace it with jam. That's just gross.


Obviously,
The Devil In You