What Not To Do...While In A School Play

If you ever happen to find yourself participating in the school play, you'll notice there's a lot of rules about what goes on backstage. One of the most important ones is to not wear outer-clothing (for example: jackets, coats, hats, etc.) If you do, you might forget that you're wearing it and end up going on stage with it still on. PEOPLE WILL NOTICE!!! And how embarrassing would that be if you wore, for example, a Tinkerbell jacket in the middle of a baseball game scene?

Laughing Mercilessly,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...During An Open Book Test

When you are taking an open book test, don't try to flatter yourself and not use your notes. Seriously, who would do that anyway? You have a chance (a very high one, mind you) of getting an easy 100% on the test, and you're considering blowing it because you want to look smart? Believe me, kid, everyone else is using their notes. No one cares if you do or not, except maybe...well, nevermind.

Bombing a Test,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...At A Drumline Rehearsal

If you are ever lucky enough to be a part of a drumline, when you are at rehearsal, DO NOT MOVE. EVER. Do not FIDGET, do not FLINCH, do not BLINK, do not even BREATHE. If you do, you will end up doing pushups. And who wants to do 150 of those?

Listening to the Band,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...When You Find A Strand of Thread Coming Out of Your Shirt

If you find a small bit of thread coming out of the sleeve of your shirt, don't pull on it! It will get longer and longer, and although that's way cool, your sleeve is going to get shorter and shorter. After a while, you will have a big long strand of thread, and no shirt. Imagine if that happened at school? Or work? Or Wal-Mart???

Thinking of Myriad Dumb Things At Once,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...In The Cave of the Thespians

Thespians...we've all heard of them. In case you haven't, they're those over-dramatic actors in our lives, usually involved with plays or drama classes. They also all have a leader, and the name of the leader depends on the school they attend. When addressing them all, we call them Directosaurus's. If you ever come in close contact with a Directosaurus, don't mess with anything you find in their cave (commonly known as stages). You will get a shoe thrown at you, which is their highest defense, and usually means they are getting angry. If a shoe is chucked at you, I would suggest that you BOOK IT.

Running Around Madly,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...With A Doghouse

When you find yourself and some of your friends near a large doghouse, feel free to play around it, on top of it, but don't play inside of it. ESPECIALLY don't see how many people you can fit inside of it at the same time. You may be able to fit a lot of people, but it's extremely close quarters, squishy, and really, really REALLY hot. And someone's breath may stink...or someone might 'cut the cheese', or...well, you get the point.

Watching the World Go By,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...With Fireworks

When you find yourself with extra fireworks after the holidays, whatever you do, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT, use electrical tape to tape all around them before lighting them. They might be duds, but the ones that aren't quite literally EXPLODE!!! The remains go flying everywhere and you won't be able to find them. You could very easily get arrested for littering.

On the Lookout,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...The Day Before A School Dance

The day before a school dance, don't go all independent on your parents. "I don't wanna do my chores" "Why do you care if my bedroom's clean or not? You don't ever go in there" "LEAVE ME ALONE I'M ON THE PHONE!" Those are some examples of things that might just get you landed in groundation-nation.

Off Carping About Someone,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...While Searching Through A Couch

You know how couches eat everything? Pencils, coins, toys, books...couches eat them all. For those of you dumb enough to go looking for your stuff - DON'T!!! I don't joke around when I say they literally eat EVERYTHING and ANYTHING. If you go sticking your hand down there, next thing you know you won't have an arm. Or worse...

Wishing You A Cheery Day,
The Devil In You

What Not To Do...When Skydiving

One day, when you find yourself diving down from the sky, don't waste your time screaming or crying or licking a lollipop. You should probably focus your thoughts on more important things. Like, why did you do this in the first place? Why were you dumb enough to do it? Are you going to land someplace safe? Is the wind blowing you off course? Are you totally screwed?

Contemplating Your Fate,
The Devil In You